BUC and I had a little chat today while I was trimming his bushes.
“Why don’t you ever cross the road?” I asked.
He answered with a metallic stare.
He was probably thinking, “I like it over here.” Or, “Was that a trick question?”
Speaking of Don’ts:
- Don’t leave your entire Blondie LP collection in the hatchback of your AMC Pacer.
- Don’t confuse the Cinnamon container for the Paprika one. Or vice versa. (Worst pork tenderloin EVER. Worst cinnamon toast EVER.)
- Don’t refer to your husband’s undergarments as ‘panties’.
- Don’t drink and draw.
- Don’t brush your teeth in the car.
- Don’t read The Tell-Tale Heart during a lightning storm when your husband is traveling on business; then call him after the electricity is out to tell him you can’t sleep.
And for the record…
Don’t get caught talking to your metal chicken in the front yard.